


North Park Girls: The Stick Of Truth (1)

by riversritual



Series: River’s Quiet Little Mountain Town AU (South Park) [21]
Category: South Park
Genre: AU, Multi, OCs - Freeform, Stick of Truth AU, gender neutral New Kid, originally written in lockdown in 2020, other characters may be included, other relationships may be included
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:48:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 86
Words: 11,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28535415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riversritual/pseuds/riversritual
Summary: New Kid prepares for a new adventure in their new home, as they join the elves to fight for a powerful weapon: the Stick of Truth.....(An AU originally written for no one to see)
Relationships: Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh, Kylie Broflovski (OC)/Kendra McCormick (OC)
Series: River’s Quiet Little Mountain Town AU (South Park) [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2114889
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

You’re the New Kid, also known as Douchebag.

Welcome to South Park: it’s not the best, but you get used to it.

The adults can be crazy, sometimes the kids your age and older can be crazier.

But you should be fine.

May regret moving here eventually, but for now it’s okay.

Anyway.

The neighbourhood kids you live near like to play games.

And they have a game you’ll be able to join once you get to know some of them.

So first, you have to go outside.

I know it sounds like it sucks already, but you’ll love it, I swear.

Meet up with the other kids.

They can teach you how to play with them.

Listen to what they say.

Play along with the game.

You’ll get the hang of it.

You’re going outside now.

Good luck, you’ll need it.

.........

You think this story sounds familiar?

It might, but at the same time it won’t.

You’ll find out why.

This is Stick Of Truth, but not the one you know.

More like: a rewritten version due to a 2020 pandemic-induced lockdown.

And now it’s online.

Fun.

But anyway.

Let’s begin.


	2. Chapter 2

You step outside.

There is snow on the ground, which is normal for the majority of the year.

You are in a mountain town, after all.

And then, you hear it.

“Help!”

Cries for help.

From in front of the house just next door to yours.

Not much of a walk, at least.

You see a human being beaten up by an elf.

The human sees you. “Hey! Can you help me, please?”

You would, but....

You want to help the elf beating him up instead.

Just to see where this story goes with a different path.

With two against one, the human is defeated and runs away.

The elf is grateful for your help. “Hey, thanks for the help. I haven’t seen you around before, are you new in town?”

You obviously don’t talk, but you can nod.

Luckily for you, the elf doesn’t seem too fazed.

“Alright, New Kid. Do you want to join us elves in defeating the humans?”

You really do.

So you nod again.

“Okay, come with me.”

You follow him.

The elven kingdom he speaks of is down the road from your new house.

“Round the back here,” the elf says, leading you down the side of the house.

But....

You are both halted in your tracks by a figure that suddenly jumps in front.

She looks at you. “Who are you?” she demands to know.

The elf comes to your defence. “It’s okay, Kylie, I can explain.”

........

This is one of them; the new characters.

Introduced to make the game more fun.

Or not, whatever. It’s happening anyway.

It’s already started.


	3. Chapter 3

The long haired redhead who stopped you from going further....

Protector Kylie of the elven kingdom.

She’s loyal to her home and family, and takes her position very seriously.

And her threats should not be taken lightly.

“New Kid wants to fight alongside us against the humans,” the elf explains, “they have already helped me with an attack.”

Kylie lowers her defence, but she’s still cautious.

Finally, she turns to you. “My apologies, New Kid, but you can never be too careful being at war with the humans these days. You’ve already faced one of them?”

You just nod again.

She smiles. “You don’t talk much, that’s okay. Just know that once I talk to the rest, you can have a place here. But watch out, some of us aren’t so easily swayed.”

Kylie instructs you to follow her now.

You, of course, do as she says.

It’s best not to cross her, you imagine.

She leads you to the back of the house where the elven kingdom resides.

And yet again....

A new character appears, with a familiar one.

“Who’s this?” one of them asks.


	4. Chapter 4

The next set of characters you face are the warriors.

Cousins Stan and Stacy Marsh.

Stacy is Kylie’s best friend.

She’s the one who’s asked who you are.

Kylie steps in then. “It’s the new kid, they mean no harm and wish to fight alongside us in battle. They have already defeated a human.”

With the protector speaking so highly of you, Stacy is willing to let you go.

Stan is more reluctant to do so, due to his position and the person in the kingdom he protects.

“Stanley, why don’t you go get the High Elf for us so we can get started?” Kylie requests. “We do have urgent matters to attend to.”

She isn’t in charge, but she is close enough to be an authority figure.

And that is why Stan lets you go so he can do as he is told.

Stacy can’t help but laugh. “Oh my god.”

Kylie herself can’t hide a smile. “I know.”

Don’t worry; you’ll find out soon if you don’t already know.

Another character approaches.

But don’t worry.

He’s more connected to Kylie.

He’ll trust you.

..........

This new character is a girl but for the game chooses to be known as a prince, since she’s related to the boy who in the game is known as a princess.


	5. Chapter 5

Prince Kendra, the only other human trusted in the kingdom.

Aside from you, when you are (hopefully) accepted.

He has the bottom half of his face covered with an orange scarf, and approaches Kylie.

Only then does he see you.

“Is this the New Kid?” the Prince asks, voice muffled but somehow still understood.

Kylie nods. “Is Stan back with our ruler yet? I want the kingdom to meet our newest fighter.”

Prince Kendra sighs. “He’s still getting him.”

The protector rolls her eyes with a knowing smile and links hands with the Prince. “Well New Kid, it appears we have some time to kill. So, do you want to hear the story of how this Prince made me fall in love with him?”

Kendra laughs. “I was just as taken with you, my lady, thank you very much.”

And you are.....

Curious, to say the least.

So you nod.

And the tale begins.


	6. Chapter 6

The truth was that Kylie hadn’t wanted to be associated with royalty at all.

She used to be a princess, but stepped down for reasons that will eventually be revealed.

So Prince Kendra came to the kingdom one day.

He wanted to be a new Allie like you, New Kid.

Kylie didn’t like Kendra at first.

Small problem there:

He liked her, a lot.

The Prince asked Kylie to at least get to know him properly.

And despite her reluctance, she agreed.

Somehow, they grew closer because of it.

........

“I fell head over heels, and despite some bumps in the road we’re engaged and happy,” Kylie explains.

Prince Kendra sighs happily. “Yes, it is amazing.”

You think they make an adorable couple.

A sudden announcement lets you know the ruler of the kingdom is coming out, at last.

Kylie groans. “Finally! New Kid, get to the front of the crowd and we’ll call you up in a few.”

You do as she says.

And wait.


	7. Chapter 7

The king of the elven kingdom, Kyle.

He is the real authority figure in the kingdom.

“Kylie, you got a new Allie for us?” he asks.

“Sven did, it’s the New Kid. They don’t talk much but I’m sure they can be trusted,” Kylie replies.

She sees you in the crowd and encourages you to come up.

You step up onto the stage, in front of the elven ruler and the two guards by the throne.

Kyle looks you over quickly. “So you’re the new kid? You don’t look much like a possible spy from the enemy side.”

Kylie facepalms. “Stan, I swear to god,” she grumbles.

Stacy laughs, before she speaks.

“My lord, I’m sure we can trust them and we could really use the help with our attack.”

The ruler considers this. “Very well, but we must train them first. Kylie, do you mind sorting New Kid with some weapons?”

“Got it,” she nods, and you follow her away.

Kylie explains to you the basic weapons you can use in battle.

“We’ll train you to make sure you can fight, but it should take some time until Kyle’s ready. I can tell you my story if you want, while we wait.”

Curiosity strikes again, so you nod.


	8. Chapter 8

Kyle and Kylie grew up as a prince and princess of the elven kingdom.

She did say she used to be royalty.

So what happened, you might want to know.

Simply put, it was too much pressure.

You’re not sure you understand.

But you let her continue.

Her parents would not allow her to step down, she fought with them every day about it.

Until her father died.

(For the purpose of the game, all three of the Broflovski children pretend their parents are dead but in reality, both are alive and well)

In the war, she says.

It left her mother in pieces for the rest of her days, before she succumbed to a deadly illness.

Kylie stepped down soon after, and became the protector of the kingdom.

Shortly after, she met Prince Kendra.

........

“I guess things got better after that, but it was rough for a while,” she confessed. “So Kyle runs the kingdom now, I protect it, and our younger brother just hangs around, you might see him eventually.”

You want to ask about Stan and Kyle.

She sees you glance over at the two of them, standing away from everyone else and talking.

“I totally called that,” Kylie laughed, “I think the only reason Kyle manages keeping everything together is because of Stan, they’ve been together longer than Kendra and I.”

Prince Kendra approaches. “Did you tell New Kid about the lovebirds over there?”

“Yeah, not the story though.”

The prince looks over at you. “Wanna hear the story quickly?”

You do.

So you nod.


	9. Chapter 9

As well as Stacy, Stan was brought into the kingdom by the old rulers, Kyle and Kylie’s parents, who knew they’d both do no harm to the elves.

Stan was assigned as Kyle’s warrior, and promised to always protect him.

The two boys became best friends, like Stacy and Kylie did.

The two girls saw the signs of love long before they did, and plotted to get them together.

It didn’t seem to be working.

But one day.....

Stacy caught them in an act of PDA.

.......

“She told me all about it once she found me,” Kylie laughs.

Kyle approaches and sighs. “Can you please stop telling that story to everyone?”

The protector shrugs. “Once it stops being funny, also known as: never. Are you ready now or should we get Stan over here?”

You think she’s the only one in the kingdom that can talk like that to the ruler and get away with it.

Kyle ignores her comment. “You’re fighting them.”

She grins. “Thank you.”

“New Kid, all you have to do is battle Kylie in combat. I’d be surprised if you beat her, though, she doesn’t go down easy,” Prince Kendra tells you.

You nod.

You’re a little scared.


	10. Chapter 10

You are put against Kylie to train for the upcoming battle against the opposing kingdom.

Kyle agrees to play witness to make sure everyone fights fair.

“Okay, New Kid. I know I’m a girl but I want you to be tough, don’t go easy on me. If someone threatens to beat you up if you hurt me in this don’t listen to them,” Kylie says.

You are ready for battle.

And so it begins.

You play fair.

Kylie doesn’t back down easily.

Neither do you.

You defeat her in battle.

The battle ends.

Prince Kendra runs over to help your opponent up. “Are you okay?”

Kylie pushes him away. “I’m okay, I’m okay, mild damage. They’re good, they’re really good.”

“Or you went easy on them,” Stacy says.

“I don’t go easy on anyone,” the protector argues, “they’re ready.”

“We should tell the others, and catch New Kid up on everything,” Kyle decides.

Prince Kendra looks at you and nods. “You stand a great chance in battle, New Kid.”


	11. Chapter 11

Once Kylie is healed, she takes you up to the stage and clears her throat.

“Ahead of our attack on Kupa Keep, we have decided to bring in a new Allie. Elves, meet New Kid.”

You stare out at the crowd.

And wave a little.

They applaud as a way of greeting.

Kylie claps her hands together. “So, I’m going to catch New Kid up on what they need to know, the importance of us getting the stick, and anything else. Then we can go. Any questions?”

No one spoke up.

She nodded. “Everyone, get yourselves armed and ready.”

The crowd disperses.

“She likes acting like she’s in charge,” Prince Kendra explains.

You don’t understand, if Kylie likes being in charge then why did she step down?

The protector approaches. “Okay. I’ve gotta cover some important stuff with you, it’s necessary before we go. Ready?”

You just nod.


	12. Chapter 12

“The Stick of Truth, it has the appearance of an ordinary stick but in reality it has limitless power,” Kylie explains.

She provides a picture of the stick, and plays a video to give you the full backstory.

‘Deep in the lands of Zara, the elven kingdom struggled to stay alive, as they were attacked by the wicked humans of Kupa Keep.

‘Darkness falls, as the elves hope and pray for a miracle to save them.

‘For a thousand years, the war has went on as the elves fight to claim the humans’ most treasured weapon:

‘The stick of truth.

‘Without it, the elves face extinction by the humans.

‘That is why there will be no peace until it has been taken.’

The video ends.

“There’s still some more to go over, if you’re ready,” Kylie says.

Of course you’re ready.


	13. Chapter 13

Kylie goes on to show you a picture of the two main enemies.

“Our enemies here are the Grand Wizards, Eric and Erica. Kyle fights more with Eric and I take great delight in defeating Erica in battle,” she explains.

“These two can be tough and annoying both together and on their own, but can also be quite powerful so be careful.”

You nod in understanding.

She smiles. “You’re getting it pretty fast, I’m impressed.”

You let yourself smile a bit.

Kylie is ready to keep going if you are.

And you are.


	14. Chapter 14

Kylie’s next few photos were of Kupa Keep, where the Grand Wizards and their army were keeping the stick.

“Okay, it’s not much of a plan, but it’s the best we’ve got. Ready?”

You nod.

Kylie pulls up a photo of the castle. “You see in there? Well I bet, and I’m a pretty good guesser if I do say so, that the stick can be found in there.”

You nod along to show you agree.

Kylie went on. “We need to catch them by surprise and cause a big enough diversion, that way we get it out from under their noses.”

She smiled. “That’s the plan. Ready to go, New Kid?”

You nod.

“Great, let’s get the rest.”


	15. Chapter 15

The army is ready to go.

Kylie speaks to the crowd. “Alright, do we know the plan and where the stick is most likely being kept. Any last minute questions?”

You hear a very rude comment in response.

Stan has to stop Kyle from going over there.

Stacy has to stop Kendra, and herself.

Kylie just laughs sarcastically. “I may have stepped down from my royal title but I’m engaged to a prince and I can still kick your ass, even if New Kid kicked mine. So watch it.”

Prince Kendra laughs.

Kyle sighs.

The protector goes on.

“Let’s move out. New Kid, you’re at the front with me.”

Stacy and Kyle are the only ones who stay behind, to make sure no one tries to do a surprise attack on them.

You wonder what those two are like in battle.

Stan makes Stacy promise to protect the ruler with her life.

Kylie ensures you’re at the front with her and Prince Kendra.

And the army walks.

At the enemy’s location, Kylie raises her sword.

“Attack!” She yells, and the army charges.


	16. Chapter 16

Kupa Keep may have raised the alarm at the first sight of trouble, but they were still very unprepared for a sudden attack.

“Get to the castle and find the stick, hide it well and re-emerge when you’re done. I can cover you,” Kylie instructs you.

She attacks Grand Wizard Erica, while Prince Kendra goes against the one you’ve heard of as Princess Kenny.

Stan goes against Grand Wizard Eric, all the others go against the other fighters of the Kupa Keep kingdom.

With everyone on the enemy side distracted, you make it into the castle and grab the stick, hiding it in your clothes.

Unfortunately, the castle has a guard who sees you.

“Hey! What are you doing?”

It’s the human named Clyde.

You have no choice; to leave, you must defeat him in battle.

Both you and Clyde enter battle.

You are able to defeat him.

Clyde has failed to protect the stick from the elves.

You leave the castle with the stick in your possession.

You have succeeded.


	17. Chapter 17

Kylie sees you exit the castle.

You simply nod and she grins, understanding what you mean.

“Retreat!” she yells.

And the crowd listens.

Prince Kendra leaves with more wounds on his enemy.

Warrior Stan has taken quite a bit of damage but can still run.

Kylie leaves her opponent on the ground, yelling “you won’t get away with this, Kylie! I’ll get you back!”

You leave with the human Clyde dreading to face the Wizards and say the stick has been taken.

On the way back to the elven kingdom, you try to give Kylie the stick.

She refuses to take it. “If we needed any more proof to see you’re trustworthy, this is it. You’ve done amazingly, New Kid, and it’s only your first day.”

“Yeah! You should be proud,” Prince Kendra jumps in.

You do feel a sense of pride in yourself.

And it makes you smile.


	18. Chapter 18

Kyle hurried over to Stan and frets over his wounds upon the return.

“Sorry,” Stan shrugs with a grin.

The ruler just sighs. “You will be.”

“But my lord, they succeeded.”

Kylie pulls you forward at that. “Show him, New Kid.”

You take out the stick to show Kyle.

Stacy takes over healing Stan while the ruler takes the sticks.

“New Kid got the stick?”

Kylie beamed as she nodded. “Yep, they got the stick.”

The king faces you again. “Thank you, New Kid, you’ve done our kingdom a huge favour. You are now a warrior for our side if you want to stay.”

You nod, because of course you want to stay.

Stan has something say next. “I’m sorry for not trusting you sooner, you’ll make a great warrior.

You have been ranked a warrior for the elven kingdom.

You have successfully stolen the stick and got it to the elves.

You have gained Stan’s trust.


	19. Chapter 19

Kylie gathers everyone for one last meeting.

She sighs. “Okay, so we now have the stick in our possession at long last....”

Pause for cheers and applause.

“.....but we must protect the stick. The wizards will try to get it back and we can’t let that happen because of the power it holds. We have to be very careful.”

She halts for questions, and there is only one.

Well, it’s not exactly a question.

“Our new warrior hasn’t been set up with the Twitter Raven yet,” an elf points out.

Kylie groans. “I knew I forgot something, thank you for reminding me.”

She approaches you as the crowd disperses. “New Kid, do you have a phone?”

You do, of course.


	20. Chapter 20

Kylie takes your phone. “Don’t worry, I’ll only add you into our group so you can communicate through the Raven like the rest of us.”

You trust her, and nod.

She smiles, and her own phone vibrates in her pocket. “That might be the Raven right now. But you’re all set up with it.”

You are handed your phone back as Kylie checks her own, and her smile drops. “Oh, shit. Kyle! Have you seen the Raven?”

The ruler is confused by this, so clearly he hasn’t.

He is as shocked as she is by what he sees.

You click into it to see for yourself.

From Grand Wizards.

‘The human Clyde has now been banished from Kupa Keep for letting a bunch of cheating elves steal the stick (hate you, Kylie) and getting beaten by the New Kid. If you’re seeing this, Douchebag, you got lucky this time, but we’re coming for you....”

Kylie growls, “I’m gonna kill her.”

Prince Kendra grabs her. “No, not tonight.”

She gives in easily and sighs. “We should tell the others.”

Kyle agrees.


	21. Chapter 21

A last minute meeting.

“Okay, so the Twitter Raven has just announced that Kupa Keep has lost one of their own for losing to New Kid,” Kylie begins.

“But under no circumstance can we let him join us,” Kyle went on.

There is some arguments and outrage from the crowd when they hear this.

Prince Kendra sighs.

Kylie claps once and silences the lot. “We can’t trust him. For all we know it’s a lie or he will agree to double-cross us.”

Kyle nods in agreement. “Everyone wants to have the power of the stick and most want it for evil, it’s too much of a risk. We just got the stick, we can’t afford to lose it.”

The crowd mutters in agreement, having not considered that.

You haven’t realised how serious it all is until this moment.

But....

Well.

You’re in too deep.

They need you now.


	22. Chapter 22

You didn’t realise it was getting late.

Kylie sighs. “Alright, everyone did a great job today. You’ve all deserved the night off, go rest up for tomorrow.”

The crowd is very grateful, and the majority leave.

“Remind me why I let you do these things?” Kyle asks.

The protector shrugs. “Because I helped convince you to let in our best Allie?”

The ruler is stuck for an answer.

Stacy laughs.

“Come on, Stan,” she says, leading the way home.

“See you tomorrow, my lord,” Stan says to Kyle before going.

“Bye, darling,” Kylie waves to Kendra as he goes.

She then faces you. “Go on home, New Kid, you deserve it. We’ll see you in the morning.”

You just nod.

You walk home by yourself.


	23. Chapter 23

You arrive at your new home.

Your parents are fighting again, like they were this morning.

Typical.

You hate it.

They act like everything’s okay.

But you know better.

You sit at the table, alone, and eat your dinner.

At least they took their fighting upstairs to their bedroom.

If only the walls were soundproof.

You made friends today.

That’s a good thing!

It’s good fun playing with them.

You’re tired.

You go to the toilet before bed.

Your mom comes to say goodnight.

You sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

It’s the next day.

You arrive at the elven kingdom.

Only Kylie and Prince Kendra are there so far.

“Hey, New Kid,” the prince waves with a smile.

You wave back.

“Did you see the aliens last night?” Kylie asks you.

You need more information, so you pull a confused face.

She goes on. “There’s been reports of sightings in the last few weeks, I’ve been trying to see if there’s anyone who’s actually seen anything.”

The information is received, and you shake your head to say no.

Kylie sighs. “Didn’t think so. Most of the reports in this town are solid but I thought the alien thing was too far.”

Prince Kendra nods in agreement.

You just nod.

“Hey, why doesn’t my prince tell you his tragic backstory while we wait?” the protector suggests.

The prince is up for it.

You nod.


	25. Chapter 25

Long ago, the elven kingdom had been the ones with the stick.

Prince Kendra and Princess Kenny were among the few humans to be trusted in the kingdom.

For the prince, his trust would be well placed and he would prove his undying loyalty to his new home.

The princess?

Well....

She was tempted by a better offer.

Prince Kendra’s trust in her died on the day she turned on the elves and got the stick back to the hands of the Grand Wizards.

Since then....

They have been fighting.

.......

You are shocked.

But it was very well told.

You applaud.

The prince is flattered.

Someone new is approaching.

But Kylie isn’t bothered.

That’s how you know it’s not someone to worry about.

She waves.

“Hey, Jimmy.”


	26. Chapter 26

Bard Jimmy of the elven kingdom.

His musical abilities can charm all.

“Hey, Kylie, and hello your majesty,” Jimmy greets in return.

“Meet our newest warrior, New Kid,” Kylie explains.

“So I’ve h-heard, it’s nice to meet you,” Jimmy smiles. “I would have been here yesterday on your first day, but I was off s-sick.”

“At least you’re back with us now, but you should have seen what happened yesterday,” Prince Kendra says.

Kyle finally emerges, appearing with Stan. “Welcome back, Jimmy. Are you feeling better?”

The bard beams. “All better now, my king, thank you. Now w-what happened y-y-yesterday?”

Kylie grins and pushes you forward a bit. “My new recruit here got us the stick, and caused Kupa Keep to banish a fighter.”

“Wow! And they just arrived in town? T-that’s so a-awesome!”

It’s safe to say Jimmy likes you already.

Eventually, the rest arrive.

You suspect your second day will be as eventful as your first.


	27. Chapter 27

Kyle and Kylie decide to both go over the plan for the day.

“We can’t keep the stick here anymore. Last night I caught Grand Wizard Eric trying to break in on the second floor. Our plan for today is to move it to what should be a safer location,” the protector states.

The crowd mutters among themselves.

Kyle takes over. “We have to hide the stick at the tavern down the road, and if the humans at Kupa Keep find out then we have a hostage thanks to Prince Kendra.”

The prince steps in, very pleased with himself as he shows off the captive.

Princess Kenny.

You are....

Not surprised.

“Who wants to take the princess to the tavern?” Kylie asks.

A lot of volunteers.

You watch Prince Kendra facepalm.

And you suspect a long day ahead.


	28. Chapter 28

Princess Kenny of Kupa Keep.

A backstabber.

A thief.

A liar.

A flirt.

You can tell Prince Kendra hates her still for that fateful day.

He loves how karma worked out.

“It was super easy to get her,” the prince tells you.

You don’t want to know what he means by that.

But....

You do think he misses his old friend.

Obviously, you won’t tell him that.

You stay quiet.

Of course.

But Princess Kenny?

You don’t like her.

She is definitely untrustworthy.


	29. Chapter 29

The hostage is being escorted by Stacy.

Kyle insists on Stan staying behind with him this time.

The warrior is against this at first.

Until Prince Kendra steps in. 

“We have Kylie, Jimmy, New Kid and the princess as a hostage as well as Stacy. I’m sure we can manage,” he points out.

Stan is still reluctant so Kylie decides it’s time to put her own foot in it.

“Quit looking for excuses to not stay behind and make out with your boyfriend.”

“Kylie!” the two snap.

The prince bursts into laughter.

You resist the urge to smile.

Kyle sighs. “Just go before I end up doing a thing I may or may not regret.”

Kylie just grins. “Great. You two have fun~”

Stacy laughs as she pulls the hostage along.

You walk at the front with Kylie, Prince Kendra and the warrior with the hostage.

To the tavern.


	30. Chapter 30

There is guards at the door of the tavern.

Stacy steps forward. “Excuse me, the elven army requires a place to hide something important.”

“Our original hiding place is compromised, so this is our last hope,” Kylie chimes in.

The guards exchange a look.

One of them asks, “What do you need to hide?”

Kylie nudges you. 

“Go on, show ‘em what you got, New Kid,” she encourages.

You nod.

And you show the guards the very important stick.

They are shocked, but persuaded.

“You may enter.”

“Thank you,” Kylie smiles gratefully.

You step into the tavern with the rest of the elven army.


	31. Chapter 31

It’s pretty quiet inside.

There is only a few downstairs, all on the side of the elven kingdom.

“Upstairs,” Kylie says.

You follow.

Stacy gives Princess Kenny to one of the others. “Take her in that room and keep her there.”

The elf nods, and does as told.

“In here,” Kylie pushes a door open.

You step into the room.

“This is t-t-the best place for the s-s-stick?” Jimmy asks.

Prince Kendra nods. “For now anyway, until the greedy and ferocious feelings everyone seems to get over it goes away.”

Kylie agrees. “We’re sick of all the fighting, I don’t want to get married in the middle of a war. But right now, we need a place in here to keep it, alright?”

You nod.

There is noise outside.

It doesn’t sound good.


	32. Chapter 32

“They’re here,” Kylie groans, quickly yanking the curtains shut.

You only catch a glimpse of the angered wizards and humans approaching.

Prince Kendra sighs. “Right when I thought we were having a good day.”

“W-w-what can we d-d-do now?” Jimmy asks, clutching his crutches and guitar.

Stacy shrugs. “Kylie? I think you out of all of us will know.”

You didn’t think she did, but you know better than to say it out loud.

The protector sighs. “We may have to escape and take the stick with us back to the kingdom. I’m sorry we came here for nothing.”

Prince Kendra takes her by the hand. “It’s okay, it was fun while it lasted.”

“So we’ll fight our way out of it?” Stacy asks.

“Looks like it,” Kylie replies.

“I should have caught Princess Kenny sooner, now she’ll be free soon,” Kendra sighs.

“Well....you might be able to fight her,” Kylie suggests.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Go ahead, we can stay here. If we’re lucky only Eric, Erica and Butters will make it to here.”

The prince smiles. “You’re the greatest.”

He kisses her on the cheek before leaving.

“You two are so cute it’s gross,” Stacy comments.

She laughs as Kylie slaps her on the arm.


	33. Chapter 33

“Stacy,” the protector says.

“Yeah?”

“Wanna fight alongside me?”

“Against the Cartmans, and Butters?”

“Yep.”

“Duh.”

Kylie turns to face you and the bard.

“New Kid, keep the stick safe no matter what, okay?”

You nod.

“Jimmy, you’re on the Raven. Tell the king the protector called a change of plans and if you have to, send the stick out.”

The bard nods. “Y-yes, m’am.”

Kylie grins.

“Good. We’ll hold them off when they get here, okay? Good luck.”


	34. Chapter 34

The three enemies come barging through the door.

Grand Wizards Eric and Erica.

And Paladin Butters.

“Stealing the stick, Kylie? I didn’t think you’d ever be able to,” Erica says.

“Well maybe you should get better fighters, at least we did,” Kylie shrugs.

Stacy struggles not to laugh.

You struggle not to smile.

“You wanna make this three against two?” Eric asks. “I’m pretty sure you won’t stand a chance.”

“Oh please, Butters is so weak he barely counts,” Kylie waves a hand.

“Now come on-“

“Shut up, Butters,” Erica snaps.

The paladin instantly backs down, proving the protector’s point.

“You want your stick? Come and get it then, assholes,” Kylie grins. “We’ve got this in the bag already.”

You and Jimmy back right up into the wall, but prepare to watch the fight unfold.

The battle begins.


	35. Chapter 35

As expected, the enemies are defeated.

Kylie is prepared to go. “Come on! We’ll just need to keep the stick in the kingdom. Jimmy, did you send my message on the Raven?”

“S-s-sure did,” the bard beams.

She smiles. “Thank you. Now let’s hurry!”

You do as she says.

The enemies try to stop you.

But they have no strength or energy left, so you are able to escape.

Kylie stops at the door to check on the now injured guards. “Are you both okay?”

One of them nods. “We tried to stop them, I’m sorry we failed you.”

She smiles. “The stick is still ours, and I’m sorry for bringing them here in the first place. Thank you for helping us, take this medicine for your troubles.”

You see her drop a small bag at their feet.

The army heads back to the elven kingdom.


	36. Chapter 36

Kyle and Kylie say they need a minute to talk.

You know they’re fighting.

They are both very loud.

Kylie says she wanted to just keep the stick in the kingdom.

Kyle argues back that it wasn’t safe.

The protector says none of this would be happening if their parents were still alive.

It’s a harsh blow.

You can hear both of them crying.

And apologise.

And agree to forget it, and just keep the stick where it is.

No matter the risks.

“We have no choice,” Kylie tells the crowd. “If we move it again they might succeed in taking it again, we were lucky this time.”

“I know it’s dangerous, but it’s the only way to protect it without putting any of you in danger. Everyone just take the rest of the day off,” Kyle adds.

“We’ll meet back here tomorrow to decide what to do,” Kylie concludes.

Despite a few mutters of doubt and fear, the crowd disperses.


	37. Chapter 37

Kylie approaches you before you leave. 

“Great work, New Kid. I’m sorry the day didn’t go as planned but you did well keeping the stick safe, I’m proud.”

You feel praised and more confident.

Kylie sighs. “Things are getting tense, and I have a feeling it’s to do with the stick. It might not be the worst idea to....”

She shakes her head. “Not important, forget it.”

You are curious.

And a little concerned.

Prince Kendra approaches next.

“You did great today, New Kid. Now if you’ll excuse us, we have a date to go on.”

You walk home as the pair leaves.

An eventful day.

But it was okay.


	38. Chapter 38

You arrive at the kingdom the next day.

Kylie hugs you, and you can tell she just really needs it.

“The stick is gone,” she says.

And she’s scared.

You hear it in her voice.

Kyle is worried too, by the looks of things.

Neither of them are prepared to tell the rest of their kingdom the news.

You would do it.

But....

That’s right.

You don’t talk.

Besides, the two are more likely to push it down and do it themselves above any other solution.

They’re stubborn like that.

And brave.

You give them that.

Prince Kendra helps to give Kylie the strength she needs.

And she breaks the news.


	39. Chapter 39

“They found a way to be sneakier and managed to take it back. We no longer have the stick. I’m so sorry,” Kylie explains.

Of course, this sparked outrage.

You are honestly quite terrified of the crowd at this point.

And have so much respect for the protector who just broke the bad news.

“This is what happens when you let HER be in charge!” one of the elves yells out.

You know this is a mistake.

Kylie doesn’t have the energy to do anything but roll her eyes.

But Kyle does.

“Say that again, I dare you,” he threatens, storming across the stage.

Stacy holds Stan back before he tries to get in.

The ruler goes on. “Kylie has worked hard to keep us all safe, we did everything we could to avoid the stick being taken again, none of us could have prevented this. We can get the stick back but I will not have anyone disrespect my sister, do I make myself clear?”

The crowd mutters silently with no more snarky comments.

“Thanks,” Kylie mutters.

You see her smile for the first time that day.


	40. Chapter 40

You are called forward by Kylie.

“The Twitter Raven has informed us that the Grand Wizards wish to meet us at the school for a final battle to see once and for all who can possess the stick.”

You nod to show your understanding.

“For this battle, we require more troops. So we need you to go convince the goth kids to fight for our side,” Kylie adds.

You nod again to say you follow, and that you’ll do it.

“Be safe out there. You may face more fighters of Kupa Keep,” Kyle advises.

You nod again.

Kylie pats your shoulder. “Good luck out there, New Kid.”

Prince Kendra gives you a thumbs-up.

You leave the kingdom.

You head out of the neighbourhood.....

Past your own house.....

And into town.


	41. Chapter 41

You are walking down the street.

On the search for the goth kids.

Everything is normal.

And quiet.

It’s too quiet....

Suspicious.....

Your suspicions are proved correct when you are jumped.

Probably shouldn’t have gone out alone.

A group of humans from Kupa Keep.

“The Grand Wizards wish to see you.”

“You came through here knowing we might attack? You fool!”

“We can do this easy, you come along nicely. Or you fight a battle you won’t win.”

You didn’t want to go.

But....

You didn’t want to fight either.

Sorry, Kylie.

Sorry, elven kingdom.

“So? What’ll it be?”

You let them take you quietly.

Or... 

Without fight, at least.

“Good choice.”


	42. Chapter 42

You are taken to....

Kupa Keep.

Home of the Grand Wizards.

And their human fighters.

You look around.

There’s.....

Not much of a difference since the elves gave their surprise attack.

And....

You judge them.

Their kingdom....

Is laughable, to say the least.

The elven kingdom is clearly superior.

You don’t see the Wizards yet.

But.....

You know.....

They’re somewhere round here.


	43. Chapter 43

Finally....

They appear.

The Grand Wizards of Kupa Keep.

Eric and Erica.

You have seen how they fight in battle.

And they’re tough.

But you know you’re tougher.

If it comes down to it you could easily beat them.

“Wow; they actually got Douchebag! Finally we have some people who can do the work right,” Eric comments.

You can see why Kyle calls him Fatass when talking about him.

“Let them go, and guard the entrance! If those elves come for us again we will be better prepared! They won’t talk about getting us by surprise a second time,” Erica adds.

The guards let you go.

And leave to guard the entrance.

You are left to face the Wizards alone.


	44. Chapter 44

Eric sighs. “I must say, New Kid, you are actually quite impressive.”

“Yeah. I mean many have tried and failed, but you were the first to actually take the stick and escape with it,” Erica added.

“How do you feel about that?” 

You just blink.

Eric sighs again. “Kyle said you didn’t talk, I just thought he was finally going deaf like I thought.”

“That’s not why we’ve got you to come to us, Douchebag,” Erica says.

“That’s right! We wanted to say you could join us!”

You really can’t believe this is happening.

Eric and Erica list a whole lot of reasons why you should leave the “lying Jew elves” and side with the “way more awesome-er side” for about ten minutes.

“Just bring the goth kids to us, and we can call it a deal.”

“You can go now.”

You leave.


	45. Chapter 45

You have heard of the goths of the school.

Kylie has already filled you in on where to find them.

You go around to the back of school and find them there.

Thanks to Prince Kendra, you have the perfect goth outfit to make them the slightest bit interested in you.

It works, the goths listen.

You pass them the note Kylie wrote out, asking them for a favour they owe her.

The goths....

Agree.

All that’s left to do is bring them to the right kingdom.


	46. Chapter 46

Your loyalty stays.

You return to the elven kingdom with the written reply from the goths

Kylie sees you first and hugs you. “We heard from the Raven you were captured, thank god you’re okay.”

She sees you as one of her friends, she was worried about you.

You know you’ve made the right choice then.

You give her the note.

The goths had pledged their loyalty, and to just send the location over.

Kyle is impressed. “Climb the tree tower and tell the goths where to find us this evening. Great work, warrior.”

You nod in response.

You climb the extremely impressive tree tower of the kingdom.

You access the Twitter Raven.

And....

Successfully message the goths.


	47. Chapter 47

You climb back down.

Kylie is waiting for you at the bottom.

“So, I’ve also heard from the Raven that Eric and Erica tried to make you switch sides to theirs,” she says.

You nod, suddenly nervous.

“Do you believe the lies they told you?”

You shake your head.

Kylie nods. “Well, at least you made a wise choice. Because otherwise I would have had to hurt you.”

You try hard not to show your fear.

She’s a tough fighter, and even if you’re tougher there’s a lot of people on her side.

And you’ve never seen her angry.

If she wants, she can be a lot more tough and dangerous than she already is.

Kylie smiles then, and it’s genuine.

“We need some more people on our side, use the Raven to check out the girls group.”

You nod, and she walks away.


	48. Chapter 48

You access the Twitter Raven once more.

From there, you manage to locate the account of the girls.

Which.....

Also....

Provides the location of where the meetings are held.

You don’t really understand it.

According to Kylie and Stacy, the meetings are highly ridiculous and pointless which is why you’ll never catch them there.

When you have the location, you go to Prince Kendra.

He is great with wardrobe, a key component if you’re breaking into a girls club.

A wig.

A dress.

Minor makeup.

And you’re done!

You officially look like one of the girls.

You’re ready.


	49. Chapter 49

At least Kyle doesn’t laugh.

Kylie laughs a bit upon first seeing you but apologises right after.

Stan and Stacy try to hold back.

Prince Kendra loves your new look.

The rest....

Laugh uncontrollably.

You start to think it’s a bad idea.

Kylie steps in. “Hey! We still need more fighters! If we want the girls to join them we must do what needs to be done! And I don’t see any of you brave enough to take their place! Any volunteers?”

The laughter dies down quickly.

She sighs. “Good luck, New Kid. Remember to come back to us when you’re done.”

You nod, knowing exactly what she means by that.

Kylie is....

Intimidating, to say the least.

It’s good to have that in an Allie.


	50. Chapter 50

You arrive at the location of the girls.

A meeting is underway.

You quickly realise how truly ridiculous girls can be.

Thank god Kylie and Stacy aren’t like this nonsense.

One of them sees you.

And suddenly, you have everyone’s attention.

The room is yours. 

You pass over the other handwritten note that Kylie did for you.

The girls pass it round to each other, silently whispering.

You are very confused as to whatever is happening.

Finally, it is silent.

The girls agree to join the fight.

But!

On one condition.

It has to be against the Grand Wizards.

You nod.

And you leave.


	51. Chapter 51

You go to....

The elven kingdom.

You are remaining loyal.

Otherwise Kylie will kill you and find a way to get away with it.

Speaking of....

She beams when she sees you have returned.

“It’s good to see you have common sense and loyalty.”

You just nod.

Thankfully, she just smiles and walks away.

Kyle is next to come over.

You’re not so scared of him, at least.

....yet.

“Great job, New Kid. You know what to do?”

You nod.

He smiles. “Good.”


	52. Chapter 52

You go up the tree tower.

You go into the Twitter Raven.

You message the girls.

It’s done.

You climb back down.

The army is gathered at the stage.

Kylie clears her throat. “We now have all the fighters we need for battle. And it’s been decided, since I’ll be stepping down eventually, New Kid will be our newest protector from today.”

You are stunned....

But so proud of yourself.

Kyle continues. “We must now prepare for battle, everyone. Quickly now.”

The crowd listens.

They go off to prepare.

Kylie nudges you. “Since you’re now a protector, wanna train some more?”

You nod.

She grins.


	53. Chapter 53

It’s time for the battle.

You stand with Kyle and Kylie at the front of the army.

Of course it’s Kylie who starts off.

“Thank you to everyone who came out here to kick butt. We have Eric and Erica inside and all that’s left to do is find ‘em.”

Kyle picked it up from there.

“We need to have all exits marked so no one else can get in or out. Goth kids take the back, small group of our own out here and at least two each at a fire exit. Everyone else is going on.”

It’s time.

You take a deep breath, and let it out.

3.....

2....

1....

“CHARGE!”

And it begins.


	54. Chapter 54

You can hear the Grand Wizards over the intercom.

“So Kylie, is your warrior feeling brave? ‘Cause-“

“Erica it is MY turn on the intercom!”

Kylie laughs.

And Kyle doesn’t want to but he does anyway.

“I am TRYING to intimidate the ENEMY here, Eric!”

“Oh hehe, RIGHT! Sure....”

“Shut up!”

“You shut up!”

“Kylie I swear, you don’t know who you’re messing with!”

“Kyle, if you’re hearing this: fuck you I hate you.”

Then it is shut off.

Your small group of friends are already laughing.

You can’t resist a small smile.

Once everyone is done, you walk on.


	55. Chapter 55

Prince Kendra goes with Kylie to search the school basement.

You thought they’d be okay, since one is a protector and for all you know the other is a strong fighter.

You don’t expect to hear screaming.

The two throw the basement door open and quickly slam it shut behind them.

“What the hell!?” Kyle exclaims.

“Zombie Nazis!” Kylie responds.

You’re not sure you’ve heard right.

Until the basement door is thrown back open.

Zombie Nazis.

You had heard right.

And react fast.

Your attacks send them falling back down the stairs.

They won’t be getting back up any time soon.

Kylie claps you on the shoulder and lets out a breathless laugh. “Now that’s how a protector works, nice one.”


	56. Chapter 56

Your group continues walking.

The intercom reconnects. “By the way, we have some surprise guests for you,” Erica cackles.

And that....

That is when you saw.....

Them....

The Hall Monitors.

Kylie sighs. “Thank god they’re no longer allowed to carry guns.”

At your shocked expression, Stacy just laughs. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll tell you later.”

You get back into the zone.

And....

Ready for battle!

The hall monitors are outnumbered....

And overpowered!

They are defeated!

“God fucking dammit!” Eric cursed over the intercom.


	57. Chapter 57

Your group finds the final obstacle....

Paladin Butters of Kupa Keep.

Also known as Eric’s personal slave.

“You cannot enter!” he claims, blocking your passage to the classroom.

“So the wizards and the stick are in there? Cool, so budge,” Kylie deadpans.

“I-I’m sorry, but I can’t allow that,” Butters says.

Stacy shrugs. “Then I guess we’ll just have to fight you.”

You enter battle.

Butters....

Is a weak fighter.

He is easily defeated.

Kyle and Kylie look at each other and nod.

“Let’s do this.”

The door is opened.


	58. Chapter 58

You find the wizards inside as expected.

Kylie laughs as Erica storms up to her. “Well, found you.”

“Oh Kylie, I’m so tempted to punch you right here right now.”

“Really, event though you’re currently outnumbered and I can easily knock you out first?”

Prince Kendra laughs.

Erica sighs. “I am currently more interested in the “zombie Nazis” you posted about on the Twitter Raven.”

“Right....you’re not the reason they’re here then?” Kylie asks.

She laughs. “Trust me Kylie, I have much more important things to focus on.”

“Fine. I’ll lead the way, since you’re such a scaredy-cat bitch.”

“Eh! I’m not scared! And I am also not a bitch!”

Kylie just laughs.

The two leave the classroom.


	59. Chapter 59

The remaining group members stare down the only other wizard.

“Give it up, Eric. We’re not leaving you alone until we have the stick,” Kyle says.

“Well unfortunately for you, Kahl, I’m not letting you get the chance. And Douchebag, since I am so forgiving, I’d be willing to forgive all the things you have done against us....if you join us.”

You are caught in the middle once more.

“Don’t do it,” Prince Kendra warns

Kyle sighs. “Don’t try wasting your time, you fat fuck. Tell us where OUR stick is and we’ll leave.”

“Oh, you fucking Jew. You’re actually feeling threatened, you know that Douchebag knows they could do better than you,” Eric laughs.

You can feel the anger of your group, steadily rising.

“Fine....New Kid, make a choice. Stay on our side or join the wizards,” Kyle says.

This is the biggest choice you must make.

Which side will you fight with once and for all?


	60. Chapter 60

Choose.

You stand in the middle of two sides.

The side of the elven kingdom of Narnia.

The side of the wizards of Kupa Keep.

Choose.

It’s a dimly lit classroom.

In a school shut for the night.

Past your bedtime.

Choose.

Kylie might try to kill you.

But....

Eric could definitely kill you and get away with it.

Choose.

What....

To....

Do?

CHOOSE!


	61. Chapter 61

You remember which side accepted you.

Kylie helped you gain the trust of the others.

Prince Kendra helped you rally more trophies.

Kyle had let you know you had a place in the kingdom.

You made new friends easily and quickly.

And had a lot of fun.

What have the wizards done?

Captured you and kept trying to get you to join your side.

So....

The choice is clear.

You want....

To stay with the elves.

You hit Cartman.

There is a few gasps of shock and you definitely hear Kyle laugh.

“Oh, it is ON!” Eric yells.


	62. Chapter 62

You and Kyle enter battle.

Eric is strong.

At least Erica isn’t in the battle, she is just as strong.

“I swear, by the moon and the stars in the sky, we will destroy you,” Kyle says.

You can hear Stan sigh, lovestruck. “He has such a way with words.”

Prince Kendra huffs. “I want to make fun of you, but I know I’m just like that with Kylie.”

It seems like Eric will win the battle.

He cackles. “You’re done for!”

“Not yet!” Kyle argues, quickly moving out of the battlefield.

You wonder what he’s doing.

He comes back with his younger brother. “Ready, Ike? Kick the baby!”

“Don’t kick the goddamned baby!” Ike replies.

You watch as he is kicked by Kyle right at Eric.


	63. Chapter 63

With Kyle’s sneaky move, Eric is defeated.

You.

Have.

Won.

“Victory!” your group cheers.

You manage to smile.

Eric groans as he struggles to stand up. “That....was a cheap move.”

Kyle can only grin. “Maybe, but it was effective and cost you your victory.”

Prince Kendra laughs. “You chose the right side, New Kid. I know Kylie already threatened you but I would have been with her on killing you.”

You know at this point to stay silent as always and not show your fear.

“So, fatass, can we have our stick back?” Kyle asks.

The wizard laughs nervously.

“I....don’t have it.”


	64. Chapter 64

“What do you mean you don’t have it!?” Kyle rages.

Eric takes a cautious step back. “I thought you had it?”

Stacy sighs. “We did, but it got stolen again. If you don’t have the stick why did you make us come here?”

“Because we thought we could sway New Kid to our side and steal back the stick.”

“But if neither of our sides have the stick...then who actually has it?” Stan asks.

You’re not even sure what’s going on.

Who actually has the stick?

Kylie appears in the doorway. “You might wanna see this.”

Erica appears a second later. “Come quick, we have no time!”

You and your group and Eric are all very confused.

You follow the two girls anyway.

To a new enemy.


	65. Chapter 65

Human Clyde, banished from Kupa Keep.

He has formed his own side.

And he has the stick.

“Clyde, you asshole!” Eric shouts.

“He was posting all about it, we had to go see for ourselves and we found this,” Kylie rolls her eyes.

Erica scoffs. “How’d he get a castle built that fast? That is not cool.”

Prince Kendra huffs. “Cheater.”

“I know, right?” Princess Kenny replies.

What will you do now?

The answer.....

Go home before you get grounded.

“Oh shit, we have to get home and to bed!” Kylie cursed.

Everyone runs off.

You do the same.

Clyde can wait for tomorrow.


	66. Chapter 66

As a result, no one got grounded.

Only given a warning not to let it happen again.

In the morning, both sides came to the elven kingdom to discuss the new plan.

“Okay, I hate to admit it but this place is actually way better than ours,” Erica says.

Eric sighs. “Yeah....Jews are sneaky, but they’re good at shit like this.”

You are hopeful and also curious about what the new plan is.

Whatever it is....

It involves everyone.

Kylie clears her throat. “So far, we know that Clyde is a backstabbing, cheating little shit.”

Cries of agreement from the crowd.

Even you have to agree.

She goes on. “It’s been discussed, and there’s only one way we can take him down.

“We have to join forces.”

This isn’t met very well.


	67. Chapter 67

Kylie sighs. “Do any of you actually have any more ideas we can try?”

And someone in the crowd decides to be disrespectful again.

This time, it’s Prince Kendra who steps forward.

“Hey! Who said that!”

And suddenly it’s silent.

“You do realise I taught Kylie everything she knows? So that means I can kick your ass a thousand ways, and worse. Respect her, before I come over there. If you have any better ideas, we’d love them!”

Erica tries not to laugh.

So does Stacy.

The prince steps back.

“Floor is yours.”


	68. Chapter 68

“Stacy; you said you wanted to say something?” Kylie asks.

The warrior nods, and steps up.

“We must unite as one,” she starts.

The prince throws a sword between the rows of seats as a response to the comments. “Respect her, too. Go on, Stace.”

Stacy tries not to laugh before she continues.

“I know both of our sides have been enemies for so long that we’re not even sure if we can get along for five minutes, okay?”

The crowd does agree with this.

“But don’t we want Clyde to go down for being a cheater and a sore loser? I mean, I know I do,” she shrugs.

“The best way to against him is with a united front. So....let’s just do it!”

The crowd cheers in response.

Kylie and Kendra applaud.


	69. Chapter 69

It came to the part where Eric and Kyle went on stage together to share some news.

“We have come to a decision about the stick and what we should do once we get it back from that asshole Clyde,” the wizard starts.

Kyle sighs. “We have to destroy it.”

The crowd doesn’t take this well, but Kylie fires a warning arrow to shut them up.

“We can’t allow the stick to exist, it’s way too powerful and we’ll never end the war if we don’t get rid of it,” the elven ruler points out.

“I know I’ve always said the Jews can’t be trusted, and I will be keeping my eye on them when we do this. But just this once we’ll have to believe they won’t try to kill us,” Eric says.

Kylie facepalms, and Kyle only sighs before he goes on.

“Tonight, we attack Clyde’s castle and destroy the stick once and for all.”

The crowd cheers.

You let yourself cheer too.


	70. Chapter 70

It’s the night of the attack against the butthole betrayer cheater Clyde.

As agreed, both sides meet at the bottom of the castle.

Including you.

Kylie sighs, and looks to the wizards. “Are you all ready?”

“Ready as we’ll ever be,” Erica nods.

“So we find Clyde, beat him up, get the stick back and go destroy it?” Kyle asks.

“Exactly,” Eric confirms.

Kylie faces you. “Ready, New Kid?”

You nod.

“Are you ready, darling?” Prince Kendra asks her.

Kylie smiles. “Definitely.”

Everyone is ready.

“Let’s go beat up Clyde!” Eric yells.

The team charges in.

Both sides united, for once.


	71. Chapter 71

You go with Kylie, Prince Kendra, and Erica.

Everyone has separated in different groups to be able to find Clyde faster.

“Come our come out wherever you are, you backstabbing little buttfuck,” Erica growls.

Kylie rolls her eyes in response. “Very original.”

“Oh shut up.”

“Besides, he can’t be a backstabber if he wasn’t on your team when he stole the stick.”

Prince Kendra laughs as Erica struggles to respond.

“Fuck you,” the wizard says in response.

You begin to wish you had in any other group.

This is torture.

You hope this ends soon.


	72. Chapter 72

Meanwhile.....

Stan and Kyle are off in a pair on their own.

They encounter a human on Clyde’s side.

And enter battle.

They win...

But one of them gets injured.

Kyle stumbles, and Stan hurries to his side.

“My lord! What’s wrong?”

“That last attack from the enemy has wounded me badly, Sir Stanley,” Kyle replies.

He winces from the pain. “You have to....go on without me.”

The warrior refuses.

“I can’t just leave you here, I won’t.”

But the ruler is more stubborn.

“Stanley, listen to me. I love you very much but I am of higher authority, so you will listen. Please, go on without me, tell Kylie I told you to go.”

Stan knows he has to go.

He doesn’t want to...

But he will.

“I love you, my lord.”

“I love you too, my warrior.”

Stan leaves.


	73. Chapter 73

When everyone regroups, you see Stan is alone.

“Where’s Kyle?” Kylie asks, suspicious.

“He made me go on without him,” the warrior replies honestly.

“What happened?” Stacy asks.

“Enemy attack from one of Clyde’s.”

You can feel Kylie’s mix of anxiety and anger.

Everyone seems to be waiting for her to blow up.

Especially Stan.

The protector sighs. “I’m gonna kill Clyde with my bare hands. Stan, you’d never leave his side willingly, he made you, you’re fine. If anything you’re whipped as hell, now let’s go.”

A lot of them find it really hard not to laugh after that.

Your group presses on.


	74. Chapter 74

As Kylie walks, she radiates anger.

You avoid doing anything that could set her off.

Which is....

Pretty easy.

You walk silently alongside everyone else.

Prince Kendra and Stacy don’t seem to be very affected by it.

You think it’s because they’re closer to her than the rest.

The prince eventually asks her a question. 

“Are you doing okay?”

Kylie sighs. “I hate Clyde so much. Anything else happens to Kyle and I’ll kill him.”

“I’ll help you hide the body,” Stacy replies.

The redhead smiles. “This is why you’re my best friend.”

You don’t think you’ll ever understand her.

You think maybe that’s okay.


	75. Chapter 75

At the top of the castle, Eric finally appears.

“You guys, come quick! I’ve cornered Clyde on the balcony!”

You can already tell Kylie’s ready.

Your group moves to the balcony.

Clyde is there like Eric said, the stick is just behind him.

“We’ve got you now, you asshole,” Erica says.

Kylie growls. “I am so ready to be done with you, why are you doing all this?”

Clyde sighs. “I made the mistake of letting the stick be taken.

“I couldn’t let it happen again!

“I was banished from the kingdom....

“I lost my job as guard of the stick....

“I was alone.....

“But now!”

Clyde laughs evilly.

“The stick is in my grasp!”


	76. Chapter 76

You can already tell....

Kylie is totally done.

Like, ready-to-murder-Clyde done.

With or without help from Prince Kendra and/or Erica.

You already know not to mess with her.

“Kylie, do you think we should proceed with the attack?” Erica asks. “I’m giving you the command so it’s your call.”

Kylie looks at you.

Her gaze softens.

She’s asking if you’re ready. Are you?

Ready to get out of here, hell yes.

But fighting Clyde?

Of course.

You nod.

She grins.

“Get him!”

You and your group go for Clyde.

The attack begins.


	77. Chapter 77

You are in battle with Kylie.

Against Clyde.

He’s a tougher fighter than before.

You hate to admit.

But....

Victory looks a long way off.

Clyde is harder to beat than Eric.

When it’s Kylie’s turn....

You watch as she walks away.

And comes back holding Ike.

“He’s got two older siblings who annoy him with their games,” she laughs.

“Ready, Ike? Throw the baby!”

“Don’t throw the goddamned baby!” Ike argues.

Kylie throws him at Clyde.

It’s a lot of damage.

You are now winning.


	78. Chapter 78

Clyde is nearly defeated.

You can finish him.

But you know Kylie has something else planned and you’d rather see that instead.

Besides, she needs it.

So you step back.

You nod to say it’s okay when she looks at you, and she smiles.

“Ready, everyone?” She calls.

A united response from below at the front of the castle gives the affirmative.

Kylie is very excited for this. “Okay! Ready. Aim. Fire!”

Clyde is hit by the arrows fired up by the elves.

The attack.

Is.

Enough!

Clyde is defeated!

You have won!

Success!


	79. Chapter 79

Eric has the honour of punishing Clyde.

“For being a fucking butthole cheater, and for stealing the stick of truth, I hereby banish you from time and space!”

Clyde is done for.

All that’s left is to....

Destroy the stick.

“Where’s the stick?!” Erica yells.

The table it had been on is now empty.

The stick is gone.

Suddenly...

A burst of laughter.

Princess Kenny has it.

“Oh my god, the princess is a traitor!”

“You backstabber!”

“What should we do?” Eric asks.

What....

Should you do?


	80. Chapter 80

Prince Kendra had really thought for a second that his old friend had changed.

But...

Seeing her with the stick?

He could only see...

A power hungry traitor.

He didn’t care about their past.

She lied....

Stole....

Left.

He wants her to die.

At least he catches her by surprise, sneak attack behind her, so she drops the stick.

“Kill her,” he demands

There wasn’t any hesitation from the others.

Even you join in.

Kylie stands with her prince.

“Are you okay?”

He smiles. “As long as I have you.”

She smiles back. “Let’s get out of here.”


	81. Chapter 81

Stan takes Kylie back through the castle to get Kyle.

He looks worse than when the warrior had seen him last.

“Stan, help me get him out,” Kylie requests.

The warrior helps the protector carry Kyle out.

“Let’s go back, to our kingdom, all of us,” Stacy says.

Kylie considers it. “Okay, but anything happens and I’ll be on your ass, Erica.”

Erica speaks for herself and Eric. “We promise.”

You finally understand.

Why Kylie stepped down.

Because she wanted to protect her family.

She had all along.

She wants a position of power....

But can’t let her family be vulnerable to attack.

You get it now.

Your groups walk back to the elven kingdom.


	82. Chapter 82

Kylie allows everyone to go home.

You didn’t want to go, a few of them didn’t either.

You’re all worried.

Not just about Kyle.

Because Kylie isn’t too good herself, she isn’t coping well.

You go over the next day.

She appreciates it.

There is a shock visitor.

“You better not be here to fight, I’m way too tired,” Kylie says.

You don’t think even Stacy is up for a fight right now.

But Eric isn’t here to fight.

He hands her a small bag. “I found out how to cure Kyle, this is it. Consider it a truce, we can exist peacefully. Together.”

“Forever, or just when we destroy the stick?” Kylie asks.

“Forever, after we destroy the stick,” Eric confirms.

He is leaving when Kylie calls after him.

“Hey, Eric!”

He turns.

“Thank you.”

He smiles, nods, and walks away.


	83. Chapter 83

When you return the next day....

Prince Kendra tells you Kyle recovered.

Kylie sees you and approaches. “Hey, protector. Thanks for coming by yesterday to check on us, it means a lot.”

You smile.

“We’re going down to Stark’s Pond tomorrow to dispose of the stick,” she goes on, “and we want you to come with us.”

You can’t say no.

You want to be there.

You nod.

Kylie beams.

You regret nothing.


	84. Chapter 84

At Stark’s Pond, you arrive with the rest.

Kyle and Stan.

Kylie.

Eric and Erica.

On everyone’s agreement....

Eric breaks the stick in half.

And Erica throws it out to the pond.

It’s over.

No more stick.

“Our two sides are now united as one, bound for the rest of time,” Eric declares.

He and Kyle shake on it.

The deal is final.

“We should celebrate,” Erica says.

“Yeah. What do you think, New Kid?” Kylie asks you.

Is it time?


	85. Chapter 85

You have been silent....

Since you first arrived in town.

You don’t talk much.

Or at all, really.

But....

It’s all over now.

You kind of....

Just want....

To go home.

So....

You say it.

“Screw you guys, I’m going home,” you say.

And walk away.

You know you’ll pay for that later.


	86. Chapter 86

Kylie and Kendra got married.

You replaced Kylie as protector.

She isn’t worried, she trusts you.

She’s a princess again.

The kingdoms are united.

Everything is good.

.......

But is it, really?

Princess Kenny isn’t happy.

She died and came back.

No one remembers.

Of course.

No one ever does.

She wants revenge.

She wants to kill.

It’s a choice.

Between the last two....

Kyle, or Kylie.

One of them.....

Just has....

To....

Go.


End file.
